Sunday, November 29, 2009

BC - Wed, 11/25/09

Given what she's just been through, Annie is amazingly perky and alert. In fact, it seems like the only reason she's there NOW is because she's chained to the hospital bed.

We've been saying all along that Trevor is probably not David's biological child because they NEVER did a DNA test. Amanda was basing the parentage on the size of the baby in utero.

Annie tells Colby that she could have walked away with Adam's entire fortune if she had turned him in after the ceremony. If she's talking divorce, I don't THINK so. She might be entitled to HALF of what was acquired DURING the marriage, but not his entire fortune.

Are we supposed to believe that Amanda is pregnant and already having morning sickness?

You know Vincent Irizarry didn't REALLY swab little Trevor's mouth, because any REAL baby would have gummed it HARD and/or gagged on it. Not that I would expect them to actually poke a swab into the poor little baby's mouth for the sake of a storyline.

That IS a new Junior Junior, right? I can't tell if it is a new child actor(s) or if the previous ones have gone through a significant growth spurt in the last month or so.

Robin "almost caught up" Coutellier

Friday, November 27, 2009

BC - 11/23-24/09

Why would Ryan bring Emma to see her mother while her mother is in a coma? All of Emma's childhood memories are going to be about her mother committing crimes, being in jail and being in the hospital.

Is anyone else getting some Boxing Helena vibes off of Aidan? He's just plain creepy at this point.

At the risk of channeling Chandler Bing, could David BE any more vague about what's ailing Annie to the point of her being about to die?

Annie notes that her husband is there at PVH. David finishes pretending to listen to her heart and says that it won't be for long because the cops are about to take him to jail for murdering Stuart. WTF? She JUST came out of a coma and he feels the need to volunteer that information to her NOW?

Liza tells Zach that there WILL be some charges about Kendall escaping, but for the circumstances and time already spent, it's going to be over. What does she mean "time already spent"? KENDALL didn't spend the time in prison, the lookalike did.

Looks like the show found a way to have Erica/Susan Lucci literally say: "I'm going to Los Angeles!"

Robin "swimming pools, movie stars" Coutellier

Friday, November 20, 2009

BC - Thu-Fri, 11/19-20/09

Wow, pregnancy for Alicia Minshew FINALLY did what years and years on the show never could -- it put a loose coat on Kendall in the winter!

I notice that the staircase isn't the only thing recycled from the old Martin house set -- that was their front door, too.

Where was Annie putting her hand to get all that blood on it? It wasn't on the front of her skirt where she was clutching her belly, and it was not on the carpet where she discovered she was bleeding (there was a big pool of it between that and the phone, LATER).

Zach asks Rachel how Ian is doing. Spike is never mentioned. Once again, WHERE is Spike?

Why would the card dealer/PI have negatives of the photos he took? Doesn't he use a digital camera? Of course, maybe he KNEW Zach would accuse him of PhotoShopping (or 'shopping, as Zach put it) the photos, so he was just covering his ass.

I guess the economy has hit the Chandler staff hard -- Lucretia is the COOK. She has never been anything BUT the cook, at least until Annie bribed her to be her Maid Of Honor. Now Lucretia is on her hands and knees scrubbing the carpet while she cries. I know Winifred left Adam's employ a long time ago, but you'd think he would have replaced her by now.

I'm guessing that Alicia Minshew had her baby between the time Kendall was drunk on the bed upstairs and the time "Kendall" came downstairs and took her robe off in front of Aidan. There's no WAY those were Alicia Minshew's legs -- they were much too full. Those weren't her hands, either. Plus, we only saw her from the BACK. Of course, given those clues AND the fact that Zach is now watching through the window while they make out, it's entirely possible that that is KAT with her hair done like Kendall's, although I don't know how she could cover up her tattoos THAT well, plus, the person we saw from the BACK was more slender than Kat (they probably used different people for the front and back shots).

Robin "Chuck Pratt Has been FIRED!!! Maybe the NEW headwriter will make all of his dreck a DREAM" Coutellier

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

BC - Wed, 11/18/09

Today's HIPAA violations: too numerous to count. Not only does David NOT immediately close Greenlee's file on the computer in response to Ryan snooping, but when he finally DOES close it, it's only to show Ryan the names of all the OTHER women who have had problem pregnancies, which David actually explains, since all we see are women's names. Not that I would ever expect David to follow ANY rules, let alone HIPAA ones, or that I would expect Ryan to follow any rules.

Adam sure does like to toss toxic items into his fireplace, doesn't he?

Wow, that's a REALLY narrow balcony/terrace outside the penthouse. It's hard to believe Ryan and Annie (among others) had sex out there (especially in the SNOW).

Assuming that Greenlee is the mystery patient (and it's a pretty good assumption), her arms are AMAZINGLY toned for someone who's been bedbound for, what, about a YEAR?

And even MORE HIPAA violations -- Jake talks to the fertility doctor about Amanda's insemination (or lack thereof).

Upon discussing the way people in PV recuperate from stupendous falling incidents, but lose babies after falling only a couple of steps, Aisling (in RATSA) mentioned that they always land in a pretty pose, unlike people suffering from real life falls. It occurred to me that there MIGHT be a way to increase AMC's viewership. Every time one of the main or secondary characters is brought into the hospital, there should be an extra in the background with something absurd going on. For instance, there can be a man sitting in a chair, waiting his turn, with a leaky hose sticking out of his ear, or perhaps someone has a ferocious and tenacious ferret biting their nose, or their foot is stuck in cement or and hand is stuck up a chicken butt in a freak stuffing incident or something like that. It would ALWAYS be in the background, and never mentioned other than, perhaps moaning, screaming or frantic or futile gesturing that everyone else ignores in favor of the main character, unless it's another extra character trying to remedy the situation by trying to pull the chicken off, etc. Hilarity ensues! Then people would tune in just to see what the unacknowledged extra-medical-absurdity-of-the-day is.

Robin "honestly, do I have to think of EVERYTHING?" Coutellier

BC - Tue, 11/17/09

Only on a soap would a man think back to having sex the night before and only envision them getting back into the front seat, as opposed to, say, Amanda spreading her legs.

I DO wish Kendall would stop saying that Zach betrayed her. She had already LEFT him for Ryan when Zach had sex with Liza.

Why is Adam pretending to Scott that he has to go handle some stockholders to ease their skittish minds? Isn't SCOTT running Chandler Enterprises now (when he's not babysitting Annie, of course)? I know Adam needed an excuse to leave, I just think the writer(s) forgot that Scott is running the company.

Now Ryan is trying to get Jake to FORCE Annie to have an amniocentesis or some other risky procedure just because RYAN wants him to! It's not like it would ever be admissible in court, although it would certainly upset Adam. The point, though, is that they would be risking a baby's LIFE on what amounts to Ryan's whim!

Tidbits:
Greenlee's patient record shows the following information:
7/16/07
10:45 am
Smythe, Greenlee
10 Atlantic Avenue, Pinevalley (one word) PA 19---
JaSkson, Montgomery 410 S 7th Str (father's name/address)
714-555-6421 (home phone)
741555-9116 (?) SSN: 144-70-4923
10 Industry Way
Jackson Montgomery (emergency contact)

Robin "we'll have to start referring to Jack as 'Jask'" Coutellier

BC - Mon, 11/16/09

I'm a little confused. How can one parent grant or not grant custody to another? Isn't that for the COURT to decide? It doesn't MATTER that David has a contract saying that if Amanda conceives a child with him that he'll grant joint custody of both children to her. Only the COURT can do that, not HIM. He can say he won't pursue SOLE custody, I suppose, but that's not legally binding as far as her GETTING custody. Isn't this a form of human trafficking? The mind boggles!

When Kendall (holding a pillow in front of her) told Aidan that he might want to be careful because she had a little accident, how many of you wondered if her water had just broken?

Jake tells an entire crowd of people (including telling Ryan directly that Annie IS pregnant and was very surprised to hear it), that Annie did not have a miscarriage. There's those HIPAA violations, rearing their ugly heads again.

I wonder if we'll be seeing a flashback to Annie having sex with someone other than Adam (Scott, for instance)? I wouldn't put it past her to rufie him and have sex with him that he wouldn't remember or would chalk up to a wet dream. You KNOW it can't be as simple as Adam fathering her child.

Robin "surprise!" Coutellier

Sunday, November 15, 2009

BC - Fri, 11/13/09

Amanda frets that she'll have no idea how her body will react to conceiving a baby artificially, because Trevor was conceived during drunken sex. David comments that it worked (which is his new plan all along, of course). Maybe Amanda should consider at least TRYING to wait another month and TRYING the artificial route before she lets David stick his dick into her again. After all, what kind of chance could an artificial insemination possibly have, what with injecting semen directly into the uterus, as opposed to drunken sex where SOME of the sperm probably gets in and the rest falls out as soon as she gets vertical (and some of it even sooner than that, hence the well-known term "the wet spot")).

In the normal course of events, a woman has about 3 days a month where she is exceptionally fertile, and she is still fertile on days before and after that, just not as IDEALLY fertile. Why are Amanda and David freaking out because they are missing an appointment for that ONE day? It can be done on another day in the same cycle. They are acting like there are only a few MINUTES available to get it done. For that matter, David could do an artificial insemination on her HIMSELF -- he did it for Greenlee. Not that Amanda wants him anywhere near her not-so-privates, but it COULD be done. Hell, JAKE could do it! If she's desperate, SHE can do it. It won't be as accurate if she does it, but it could be done. I'm pretty sure she knows where her vagina is. But noooooo. Once again, Amanda proves she is Too Stupid To Live. Whatever happened to our sweet, SMART little Amanda? It's like somewhere around puberty they took her brains and pumped them into her breasts.

Kendall sure is hard on laptops, what with throwing them around, slamming the lids shut and bonking people over the head with them.

Robin "Kendall would be a good candidate for a dozen or so of those Panasonic ToughBooks" Coutellier

BC - Tue-Thu, 11/10-12/09

What kind of idiot wears shiny high-heeled boots to do a burglary or whatever it is that Madison was doing breaking into Frankie and Randi's apt? Idiot.

Why would Angie take confidential hospital documents to a BAR to work on them? Same reason lawyers take crucial legal documents to a bar, I suppose. Idiots.

Wasn't Jake Chief of Staff at one point, or was he Chief of Surgery? He acts like he doesn't know what the job entails when Angie lets him know that she's overwhelmed.

Where was Jesse when Randi called him to say that Madison was in their apartment? I'm guessing he hadn't even gotten down to the sidewalk.

When Annie told Scott that the way to help her was to throw her down the stairs, I winced for a number of reasons, but mostly because I thought of Aisling (a RATSA regular) and her fall down the stairs. Why do people think falling down stairs is not that big a deal other than a few bumps and bruises? It can have LIFELONG repercussions (assuming you live through it at ALL)! Idiot.

One of the weird laws of physics in Pine Valley is that people fall off cliffs, drive off cliffs, jump from penthouse balconies, etc., with little to no damage, but if a pregnant woman falls down TWO steps (or just trips over a shoelace), she automatically loses the baby. Leslie Coulsen fell off the top of the Chandler building and then sneaked out of the hospital. Of course, if the storyline requires it, there MAY be damage, such as when Bianca fell/was pushed off a balcony by JAR and when JAR jumped off a 4th floor balcony.

I can't believe Jake is even giving LIP-service to the concept of doctor/patient confidentiality! He tells Ryan he can't TELL Adam Annie is/was not pregnant -- Adam just has to be in the vicinity to overhear it. Since when has doctor/patient confidentiality ever been a concern to medical "professionals" in Pine Valley (or to a Martin, for that matter)?

David's car runs out of gas. Amanda yells at him and he says they have to flag down a car. She can't remember the last time she saw a car come by there. Really? I didn't SEE any cars, either, but I HEARD a shitload of them zooming by -- unless they got caught up in some weird 21st century version of a buffalo stampede consisting of buffalos driving vehicles at speeds way faster than 25 mph while on their way to the next river to cross, there is no way they were on a deserted road at the time they pulled over.

Robin "someone needs to have a talk with the foley editor" Coutellier

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

BC - Mon, 11/9/09

I love that Adam's notion of Purgatory is that they are now serving 003 and his ticket shows he's number 420

Those wimpy wings are way too small for Angel Annie. She'd never get off the ground with them!

I'm under the impression that a marriage isn't really valid unless the marriage certificate is signed by both parties and witnessed and that the ceremony is really just a formality. Is that true? Even if saying vows is part of the legality of it, if Adam literally DIED during the ceremony, wouldn't he be considered not of sound mind at the time? Then again, he was clearly not of sound mind when he married Krystal, considering that both of them were shit-faced on moonshine at the time. He was just as eager to be married when he gained consciousness, though, so I guess it's a moot point.

Oh, as as to the question of the color of eBabe's dress, it looked purple on my TV. It's a DULL purple, but a purple, nonetheless.

Aidan schmoozes the police officer, pretending that he and Kendall are having an affair. The officer tells him to relax, that they are real good about keeping secrets around there. Aidan says: "What do you call this place, anyway?" Officer: "Peyton." BWAHAHAHAAAA! I feel really old for having to do this, but for you young'uns, this first line from the Wikipedia page pretty much sums it up: "Peyton Place is a 1956 novel by Grace Metalious. "Peyton Place" has become an expression to describe a place whose inhabitants have sordid secrets." I remember reading it as a young teenager. It also became movie in 1957 and a TV series in 1964 (making Ryan O'Neal and Mia Farrow into stars). It was a ground-breaking book and considered QUITE scandalous at the time.

It never ceases to amaze me that patients at PVH are routinely treated by doctors who hate their guts and have tried to kill them MORE THAN ONCE! WTF is WRONG with these people?

Okay, for you Misty Croslin types out there, that thing about spouses not having to testify against one another is a MYTH. Oh there's SOME truth to it, but it's not a blanket immunity kind of thing. They don't having to testify as far as things that have been said DURING THE MARRIAGE. We went through this when Kendall and Zach remarried for the same purpose. That only happens on TV and in movies. Anything that transpired BEFORE the marriage is fair game, so getting married to avoid testifying is a stupid and useless thing to do. At least that's MY take on it.

Well, now that Adam nearly died and he probably has to take it easy for a while, it practically makes it MANDATORY that Annie and Scott have sex, not only to make a baby ASAP, but because Annie will be feeling horny and Adam won't be able to satisfy her.

Robin "congrats to Alica Minshew & hubby on the birth of their baby girl last week!" Coutellier

Sunday, November 8, 2009

BC - Fri, 11/6/09

What is the old Martin staircase doing in a "crummy" hotel? They don't do crummy hotel lobby very well -- it looked all right at first glance. The proprietor certainly has a crummy attitude, though. Okay, the bed IS kind of crummy, as are the broken blinds. The bathtub, for some unfathomable reason, looks pristine on the inside. You'd think there would be chips, soap scum, rings, perhaps some oily substance, hair, etc. It looked downright sparkling, though.

Why is Kendall taking a bath with the door open?

Considering that the cliffhanger is that Adam may or may not be dead (in the middle of his wedding, no less), it was a pretty boring show. Zach, as usual, thinks ahead. With Josh, he told them to save his heart (for Kendall). With Adam, he says Adam is not going to die without confessing first.

Robin "Zach has always been a very ... FOCUSED man" Coutellier