Wednesday, September 29, 2010

BC - Mon, 9/27/10

Why would Bianca hire Asher to teach Miranda to do computer stuff and leave her ALONE with him? She has no idea who Asher is. You'd think someone in her position would have a background check done on someone before giving him access to her child/children and unsupervised access to a computer with Cortlandt business files on its hard drive.

eBabe is going to sue for custody of AJ. Gee, what a surpri-- oh, I can't even type it ...

Obviously Erica is about to make a reappearance. I haven't look at her Twitters, but when they mentioned how many people follow her, I had to wonder how many of those followers (on their real-life Twitter account) are fake.

I suspect Ryan was talking on the phone to Jack about Greenlee's legal situation, since Jack and Erica are about to return to town anyway.

Robin "looking refreshed, I'm sure" Coutellier

BC - Fri, 9/24/10

Tad reminds Greenlee that it's all well and good to protect the people you love, but there's this pesky thing called "Obstruction Of Justice". WTF? That's rich coming from TAD! Does even a MONTH ever go by when Tad hasn't broken the law in that regard?

Who's putting on Angie's makeup now that she can't see?

See, not even an hour goes by and Tad's already trying to persuade Jesse to just let it go as far as the suicide letters being a forgery because, after all, one of their very good friends might go to prison otherwise.

Robin "Tad is as SantiMartinous (tm) as ever" Coutellier

BC - Thu, 9/23/10

Well, Asher is a nasty piece of work, isn't he?

Greenlee sure does like those shoes, doesn't she? OTOH, I can see where she would not have any extras given her current nomadic existence. Damn, that's a helluva pair of shoes to be stuck with as your only pair.

Greenlee is going to store her stuff (one suitcase for a very rich woman) at the office (and probably bunk there on the Pop 'N Fresh Rolls couch) because she's tired of the Yacht Club? What happened to the Valley Inn? Did it get blown away in the tornado and not get rebuilt? I gather her grandparents died at some point. What happened to the Greenlee estate? She could also stay at Kendall and Zach's place since they didn't rent it out or sell it -- Kendall has to stay at Wildwind for now.

Greenlee tells Kendall that David wrote the letters to people who he wanted to remember him fondly. Why would he write to Amanda, but not Anna? He loved Anna, they just couldn't stay married.

Tad tells Ryan: "Listen, I talked to Jesse -- the police investigation was VERY thorough." BWAHAHAHAHAAAAA!!! ROTFLMAO!!! Stop, yer killin' me!

Kendall is such a self-entitled BITCH! Liza cuts her a deal (against her will) and all Kendall can do is whine about it, taunt Liza and basically be a spoiled brat about it. I LOVED it when Liza reminded Kendall that the town of Pine Valley has forgiven her again and again and again :-)

Considering that someone knocked Caleb out cold at the front door, none of the women in the house seem particularly worried about an attacker being on the loose. Oh, sure, they wanted to call the police, but Caleb said no, so they went with it without another thought to the attacker other than how it affected the traumatized AJ.

When Kendall and Bianca were discussing Kendall telling Zach about why she has to stay in PV instead of being on their yacht for another 3 weeks, Kendall points out that they were moving back to PV because Zach basically wanted her to be happy. And how does she repay him? She gets criminal charges. She did not INCUR criminal charges, she did not commit a crime, she simply "got" criminal charges. I just want to slap her!

Robin "she's definitely Erica's daughter" Coutellier

Friday, September 24, 2010

BC - Wed, 9/22/10

Uh, never mind the criminal investigation aspect of it; why is it okay for anyone at all to walk into the room David and Greenlee shared? Even their stuff is still in there! Are reporters and photographers allowed to just walk on in and do whatever they want, too? These were rich and famous people involved, after all. Yeah, Marissa is David's daughter, but it doesn't look like she went through any channels to get into the room. Then Kendall and Bianca come in and encourage Marissa to trash the room as a form of therapy. The security in Pine Valley is pathetic!

The Tivo description for Wednesday's show says "Asher is attacked". Really? 'Cause at the end of the show CALEB was the one who collapsed after touching the package on the doorstep.

Robin "does Homeland Security know about that package?" Coutellier

BC - Mon-Tue, 9/20-21/10

I'm not impressed with the shrink hypnotizing Ryan. She brings him back to being in the room with David and says he's confronting him. She asks "Are you ANGRY?" Uh, that's leading/planting. She should ask how he feels, not pick a feeling and ask him to verify it.

Greenlee tells Jake that she heard Ryan remember that he loves her. And hearing him say that, she realizes she still loves him, too. Gee, what a shocker. She must be REELING from not one but TWO such profound realizations. Geez, you two, get a room! And lock yourself in it without any cameras and never come out again. Then we'll ALL be happy.

Greenlee tells Jesse that she told David that their whole relationship was a lie. Uh, it was a lie from the moment DAVID starting banking blackmail points and then using them against her. Of course, he DID find out that her faking giving it a try after that all came to light was a lie, but WTF did he EXPECT?

Why are Jesse and Greenlee sitting on the terrace at the Yacht Club reading



So is that park part of a studio back lot or a private estate or do they just keep shutting down parts of a public park to film AMC episodes?

Why would Kendall need a kitchen tour of the penthouse? She used to LIVE there and has contributed on many occasions to the big stain on the floor in front of the fireplace.

Why would Jesse give Greenlee any letters from David to be delivered to ANYONE? That makes no sense whatsoEVER! Not only would the letters need to remain in the chain of custody, but they'd have to be checked for prints, trace-DNA and other forensic and authentication testing. If the police suspect David was murdered, there's no way in HELL those letters would be anywhere but in an evidence locker (LOCK being the operative word) until after a trial. Besides, aren't those letters ~printed~, as opposed to handwritten? How does Jesse know that they weren't planted after the fact? The only handwriting I saw was David's scrawled signature.

In a later scene, Jesse says the lab is still working on the letters. Huh? Then how did Greenlee get the letter to give to Amanda? A copy? Putting it in a copier would also compromise the forensic integrity (snort!) of it. What did she do, take a photo with a phone and then print it?

Why hasn't Jackson come back to support his daughter? He was mad at her, but this kind of thing should trump that. I understand why MARY didn't come back; I'm not sure it would even occur to her to do so.

Robin "did Erica twitter about THAT?" Coutellier

Friday, September 17, 2010

Fashion Is NOT Their Friend

Earlier I had mentioned Greenlees fetish shoes and the mess of a blouse that Bianca was wearing. Here are some screencaps of those fashion dos (they ARE apparently in fashion) and don'ts (just because you CAN do something doesn't mean you SHOULD do it).

Here are three views of Bianca's very long blouse*. Almost full length from a slightly side view, it's busy, but not TOO bad:

A closer look shows how busy and asymmetrical it is: one shoulder up, one shoulder down, ruffles going under the arm, ruffles and odd draping on the front, ruffles and odd draping down on the belly, etc. Hidden by the box and arm is a belt with either a buckle and/or bow-like protrusion on her left. The colors aren't quite right here -- the blouse is a little too rosy-yellow in these screencaps -- the blouse was more beige on TV.

And then there is the number one reason NOT to wear this blouse:

'Nuff said.

*previously referred to as a dress

Robin "a fashion don't" Coutellier

BC - Thu, 9/16/10

The show started with Ryan remembering/dreaming about the fight preceding David's presumed death. Ryan was being tortured by David saying "Greenlee is mine, Greenlee is mine, Greenlee is mine", ad nauseam. I kept thinking that what SHOULD have been said and repeated was "What the hell kind of name is GREENlee??" [Yes, I know that Greenlee is the surname of Greenlee's maternal grandparents]

In a new role, the biggest since it portrayed Kendall's home pregnancy test, we have a character-prop labeled "Digitalis", making new appearances as often as possible when it really ought to stay hidden, especially when Greenlee, herself, says that her possessions are being searched for evidence.

That is one extremely unflattering top Bianca is wearing. Actually, it kind of looks like TWO unattractive (not to mention bland) tops, ripped up and loosely basted/glued to each other. What did the wardrobe dept do, tell her to twirl around the set while they threw tops at her, vowing to go with however they landed?

Tad says he can't imagine Ryan poisoning David, and he doesn't think Ryan can imagine it, either. Really? This from the man who buried someone alive and tortured him for, what, weeks, before he died in an "oopsy!" moment? Ryan has tied people up plenty of times, and wasn't he part of the group that strung up Richie with a noose and a chair (just to scare him)? Ryan was raised by a man who routinely beat his wife and children. He was a con-man. He's a man who drives motorcycles off of cliffs and callously lets people think he's dead. He was also the man who went to Fight Clubs and almost punched his wife with his clenched FIST! Being a soap hunk/"hero", he has moved from one violent storyline to another for years on end. Hell, he was beating the SHIT out of David minutes before David died! Ryan is a man of impulsive AND planned violence. He's lost his memory on several occasions and had a brain aneurysm. His brain is obviously f**ked up, probably in part due to all the blows to his head (fists, feet, bullets, rocks, pavement, boards and various handy instruments). Even titanium will break eventually. Poisoning should be a piece of cake (so to speak) for him, especially when it comes to protecting his lady-love (the aforementioned near-punchee).

Kendall says Ryan couldn't possibly have used Digitalis to poison David -- how would he even know what the drug would do? Uh, one word: I-N-T-E-R-N-E-T. Oh, looks like she figured that out by the end of the show (via his phone search history). Now the vial of "D" has fingerprints from, at a minimum, Greenlee and Kendall, both of whom are obvious potential suspects.

AJ got into a fight with another kid, who required 11 stitches. The principal discusses it with JAR who bribed him to let it go via an offer of new playground equipment, which makes me wonder why they are sending their precious little heir to a school that's so cash-strapped it can't even afford decent playground equipment. In today's politically correct, zero tolerance atmosphere, I'm surprised Jesse wasn't there arresting AJ.

Okay, THAT much invocation of Leo's name is a pretty good indication that Leo may show up again. And they aren't just showing LEO's photo -- it's a photo of Josh Duhamel playing Leo. I would LOVE to see him on the show again, but I have my doubts he'll return; they couldn't afford him anymore, and he's busy making several movies. However, I could easily see them pulling a JaNut and have him return after extensive plastic surgery, looking like a "new" man. If he does, that would make TWO of her husbands that have returned from the dead (THREE if we assume that David is not really dead and will eventually come back). Greenlee, herself, has returned from the dead. She's not a Black Widow so much as an out-of-control dead/not-dead remote control, not unlike a malfunctioning garage door opener.

Robin "whatever happened to her 'natural look' makeup campaign?" Coutellier

Thursday, September 16, 2010

BC - Wed, 9/15/10

Jesse ponders photos of the main suspects (in his mind) of David's murder. Uh, he left out a few key photos; for instance, he should have included an extended-FAMILY photo of his own family. Of course, it could be something as simple as David berating a waiter at the Yacht Club.

I've long thought that the Pine Valley Bulletin was a rag. Don't you just love how they put a close-up of David lying dead on the floor and the photo takes up almost an entire page? We should be glad he wasn't disemboweled or we'd be seeing entrails roped all over the Yacht Club floor. OTOH, if we'd seen THAT we might be slightly more inclined to believe he's REALLY dead. Notice I said more inclined, not CERTAIN.

Greenlee chose to wear THOSE fetish shoes to David's funeral? They made ME think of how she was virtually shackled/bound to him. You'd think she would never want to wear anything at all that would remind her of that.

Is Angie going to pray out loud every day that she's on the show?

Robin "the location of the impromptu wake WAS really thoughtless and tacky" Coutellier

BC - Mon-Tue, 9/13-14/10

Kendall accused Greenlee of intending to send Erica to prison. Greenlee, who was "coming clean" about everything to Kendall and Bianca, said: "No!" Uh, YES. She absolutely, unequivocally intended for Erica to go to prison; I remember she and David discussing it and chortling gleefully over the prospect.

Amanda, Jake and Tad go over papers David filed in an effort to get rid of Angie. Tad says that it's too bad she chose to continue to practice medicine even though she was losing her sight. Jake: "She should lose her CAREER over this?" Uh, YES. I don't have a hate-on for Angie -- I like her a lot, in fact, but she DID screw up.

If someone is about to be fired for practicing medicine while blind, why would having all her friends there to testify as to what a good person she is make a difference? Why would they all be allowed in the ROOM, even? It's not like it's a public court hearing. If they are going to speak on her behalf, it should be one person at a time with the others waiting in a different room. And Greenlee SHOULD be there, considering that she is on the Board (or a proxy should be there for her; she WAS widowed only the night before, so I imagine they could cut her some slack). Does the Hospital Board consist of only three people?

Now all Angie's friends and family are clapping for her after she defends herself. Angie stands there, noble in her refusal to accept being "handicapped". It was a nice speech, but is that really the place for her own entourage to be applauding her as if she just gave a rousing valedictorian speech? And her being handicapped is not the issue. She didn't fess up to it and put the hospital and patients at risk. She also, most likely, put others at risk of catching whatever she has. They made a point after a LONG time to say it was not contagious from HER, but they made a HUGE point of the fact that it was EXTREMELY contagious from the patient from whom she caught it. As she stood there looking noble and self-righteous, I thought of the speech Otter gave in Animal House and how all his frat brothers stood up and hummed the national anthem as they marched out in a self-righteous huff of American pride, which had nothing whatsoever to do with the issue at hand.

Why aren't a bunch of OTHER doctors and medical personnel in the peanut gallery? Yes, there are letters, but the presence of someone other than her friends and family might indicate that someone cares enough to do more than write a letter or sign a petition.

Why didn't JAR call eBabe when he realized AJ was missing, if only to find out if AJ went to HER?

Ryan bursts into the penthouse and informs Madison that he didn't do it -- he's FREE! Hold on there, Ryan -- you didn't BEAT him to death, but there's nothing to indicate yet that you didn't manage to get a lethal dose of Digitalis into him.

If Ryan was arrested for murder, wouldn't they have gotten a search warrant to search his place immediately?

Madison must have left the hearing the second she finished praising Angie, because the hearing was still going on when Madison was at Ryan's place.

Why did the Board make JAKE read the letter from David? That's just plain STUPID and totally unexplained. Was it so that the actors playing board members wouldn't have to be paid for the number of lines that needed to be spoken?

A vial (an empty vial) of Digitalis was in Ryan's coat pocket. You KNOW it was planted.

I wonder if Mayor Blanco had anything to do with dosing David. Yes, she was pugnaciously in David's corner in all things, but what if he had something on HER, too? Maybe she was sick and tired of doing his bidding, politically speaking. So why would she plant the vial in Ryan's pocket? Why not? At least it's not HER pocket.

Then again, the medical access to liquid Digitalis steers it back toward Nurse Gayle. Of course, ANYONE in town can get access to ANYTHING they want, one way or another, so that puts the Digitalis ball back in everyone's court.

In an AMC historical note, Digitalis was used to kill off David Thornton back around 1978. David Thornton was also a doctor (and cardiologist at that, I think). He tried to kill Edna Thornton by putting Digitalis in her wine. He was treating her for heart problems and he thought he could get away with it because the Digitalis would be untraceable (apparently they've figured out how to trace it since then) and it would mimic (or cause) a heart attack . He and Edna were distracted by something and little Dottie Thornton (6) playing around, almost drank from it, then quickly put the glass back, inadvertently trading the places of the wineglasses. David died from a heart attack brought on by massive dose of Digitalis.

Robin "in Pine Valley heart doctors named 'David' are doth destined to die due to dreaded Digitalis" Coutellier

Sunday, September 12, 2010

BC - Fri, 9/10/10

Maybe it was just the camera angle, but before they whipped the sheet of of David's body, I had to wonder if they were hiding Fatty Arbuckle under it. Oh, and when the doctor DID take the sheet off, VI moved his head slightly.

Why is it that all the women in Pine Valley hallucinate, especially after someone dies? On rare occasions, men hallucinate, but mostly it's women. As an oft-quoted saying goes: "Them bitches is CRAZY."

If JAR is trying to take over his company, why is Scott drinking at Krystal's instead of going to work and trying to straighten things out, network, wheel and deal, etc. Does his badge not work anymore?

I notice there are STILL decanters in the Chandler living room, despite JAR being an alcoholic and having children running around.

Why was Kendall surprised that someone paid her bail and she's free to go? Wouldn't she have had to go to court to have her bail set in the first place? She apparently has off-camera "high priced lawyers" who arranged bail, so she should have known that she would have been out pretty quickly. You'd think she would know the drill by NOW.

Robin "do people ever get released from the PV jail early due to overcrowding?" Coutellier

BC - Thu, 9/9/10

Isn't it possible that David was NOT murdered? It's been speculated that the ME sounds a lot like Vincent Irizarry -- and he DOES. I'm reserving my opinion as to whether he's a) dead, b) took one of his homemade potions to make him APPEAR dead and bribed the ME to go along with it, or c) he paid someone else to get plastic surgery to look like him, then disguised himself as an ME, having drugged the plastic-surgicized (yes, I DID just make that word up) person to make him appear dead.

So they ARE going to do an autopsy in an completely inappropriate room.

Does anyone else keep thinking they are seeing Greenlee when the camera first shows the new Bianca?

The "interrogation" of Ryan keeps getting interrupted because people keep dropping by the PVPD to visit with him. WTF? They are trying to get to the bottom of a possible murder and women keep knocking on the door to talk the person of interest out of cooperating and the police just acquiesce and let them interrupt the questioning! Ryan may not be under arrest at this point, but I'm pretty sure police don't allow people to barge on into interrogation rooms. For that matter, most places nowadays are behind bulletproof glass between the public entrance and the inner workings of the dept and you need to key in a code to get in or be buzzed in, but the PVPD has always been set up like it was in the town of Mayberry RFD in the 1960s.

It's the next day. If Natalia has enough time to take a walk in the park, why doesn't she have enough time to go home and change the clothes she was wearing the night before?

How can Liza book Ryan for murder if they don't have proof yet that David WAS murdered?

Robin "all they know is that he's dead and not even THAT is certain" Coutellier

Friday, September 10, 2010

Extras On Parade!

I haven't seen Thursday's show yet, but in the meantime here is a video and images of what I was talking about regarding the extras. As it turns out, the "woman" with the hat is actually THREE women in hats and party dresses, so no wonder it seemed to me that their walk-ons were excessive! There's a blond, a brunette and a redhead, and they all have their hair up in a bun. I guess I was so focused on the regular characters when I did the Boogie Chillen that I didn't look close enough at the extras to realize it was 3 different women -- I was just distracted by them constantly walking by.

On Tuesday's show (the first day of David's death), they were there a lot, but they didn't do nearly as much walking. They mostly stood around talking to people and gawking at David's dead body. At one point they were gawking so avidly I was pretty sure they were going to ask someone to take off David's pants so that they could see him better. Some of the other party guests walked around a LOT, though. Over and over and over again.

On Wednesday's show, the feather-hatted women were on so much that I made a little clip of them so you could see just how often. It's probably better to watch it without the sound since I edited it that way; it's probably quite choppy.

Actually, there was also a man dressed in black, including a black bow-tie and he walked by almost as often as the hatgirls. I think he was telling them where to walk.

And here are a couple of views of the woman with the hideous white dress with the shiny accents and flaps/sort-of bow ... thing ... At one point she started to bend/squat down so that her head would get into a closeup of (I think) Greenlee over the body, but the editors probably realized what she was doing and stopped it just short of her neck.

On a side note, I didn't realize how often Jesse leans way back as he's talking or just tilts his head up. I want to see a clip of THAT one Hubbard-centric day.

Robin "a little something extra" Coutellier

Thursday, September 9, 2010

BC - Wed, 9/8/10

Uh, where IS David's body? I know he can't be in the morgue because Amanda just waltzed on in. So ... it's not the morgue, right? Right. I mean, once they start in with the saws and stuff, blood could mist over to the windows and blinds in the room, which weren't far from the table. If you are going to be doing autopsies, you really want a room that can be easily hosed down, not to mention quite cool. I think it was just a hospital room. That begs the question of why the pathologist was headed toward it, but maybe he was going to wheel David to the morgue himself.

I wonder what the Medical Examiner thought of Amanda. I mean, when he looked at her, did he see an extremely attractive, sexy woman or a "healthy young adult female with no obvious deformities or injuries; approximately __ centimeters in height and __ kilograms in weight; bi-lateral breast implants, serial numbers to be noted at a later date"?

All things considered, David's body should be GUARDED all the time until an autopsy is done. After all, pretty much everyone in town (and OUT of town, for that matter) hated his guts and might have cause to tamper with the body. But nooooo, there's Jake, inspecting the body, hands-on, despite the fact that he went to great lengths to thwart David and have his medical license taken away. Jake is not only one of the top suspects in his own right, but he's strongly attached to some of the other top suspects. And there's Amanda, who has reasons of her own to hate David, even if she is weepy and sentimental about his death. Is anyone else going to visit the body before it gets autopsied?

What is WITH that extra with the little hat at the Yacht Club? She keeps walking back and forth and back and forth and back and forth, usually right past the spot where David's body was. Someone needs to give that woman a Xanax or strap her to a chair or something. Or just boot her out -- she has no business there. I didn't see her carrying any swabs, so I'm pretty sure she's not a member of the Forensics team. She's a member of the Look-At-My-Hat team. She was like one of those battery-operated toy cars that changes direction upon bumping into things, with no particular destination planned, just aimlessly wandering around.

Jesse is concerned about Angie, so Natalia urges him to take the night off assuring him that everyone who needs to be on the case is already hard at work [snort!]. So he does. David Hayward has just been MURDERED and the Chief of Police, who was there at the time, takes the night off at the urging of his rookie detective daughter. Nice. Of course, given the enmity between Jesse and David, it's probably just as well that he DOESN'T work on the case, but shouldn't he be around for other shit since so many other Public Safety personnel will be focusing on the murder? Who's going to hand out speeding tickets, show up after 7-11 robberies, and bust drugged-out teenagers at the boathouse? Oops, no boathouse anymore. Okay, who's going to bust drugged-out teenagers and various sexual deviants prowling that pretty park in the night? Who's going to show up when someone inevitably punches David Hayw-- um, scratch that last one.

Robin "the Props Dept will have to install punching bags and/or clowns at all the PV homes and establishments to take up the slack" Coutellier

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

BC - Tue, 9/7/10, Part 2

Who are some of the suspects in David's death? Let's break it down:

Ryan (obvious choice, so we know it isn't him even though they were just beating each other) - David has hurt pretty much everyone knows. Ryan has a long history with David, going back Gillian. David had made another one of his devil's deals with her when he told her he'd give her money Ryan desperately needed if she would have sex with him. He promised not to tell Ryan. He DID tell Ryan and he kept the money besides (I think). Ryan was one of the people drugged with Libidozone on the yacht party many years ago. David is currently blackmailing Greenlee, the purported love of Ryan's life. David is an asshole.

Greenlee - David has hurt just about everyone she knows. He's blackmailing her into staying married to him and is forever trying to do dastardly things to the purported love of her life, Ryan. He's the reason (sort of) that Erica's plane went down. Mostly it's the emotional abuse, though. David is an asshole.

Angie - David has hurt just about everyone she knows. David has hounded her on the job from day one, both as a doctor and then as a major stockholder/board member. He has also hounded her son and threatened both their jobs. He got the mayor to put Jesse on suspension and tried to get him fired. His drastic cutbacks threaten the health of every person in the hospital and are, in a roundabout way, partially responsible for Angie going blind (in PV logic). Angie hates him for many reasons. Note: Not only did Angie not wear gloves (no excuse), but she had blood on her FACE -- how would gloves have protected her from that? David is a sphincter.

Jesse - David has hurt just about everyone he knows. On a more personal level, David is going after Jesse's family. Jesse hates David with a passion, and he'll hate him even more once he figures out that Angie didn't have gloves immediately available because of David (yes, we know it's her own fault, but that's not going to fly with the Hubbards). David is an asshole.

Frankie - Same reasons as Jesse and Angie, plus his own job is at stake. David is an annoyance.

Randi - She loves the Hubbards and David's constant hassling of them is keeping Frankie from admiring HER 24/7 and spending more money on her. David is an annoyance.

Madison - David tried to get her to spy on Ryan by bribing her with payment of all her bills. She refused. She's loyal to Erica, who helped her when she needed it most, and David almost got Erica killed. She loves Ryan now and David has always treated Ryan badly. Now Ryan is all up in David's face and constantly mixing with Greenlee because of David. David must go so that Ryan can be with MADISON 24/7 and buy her shoes. David is an annoyance.

Erica - David has hurt just about everyone she knows. Erica and David have a VERY long history, good and bad, on the show. He has drugged her (accidentally), kidnapped her, etc. Now he's responsible for framing her via embezzlement of Miranda Foundation funds and he is the main reason behind the circumstances of her plane going down. He was more than willing to send her to jail for the embezzlement and was instrumental in trying to take Fusion away from her. Now he's going after Ryan, who is a very good friend and former (barely) lover. She hates Greenlee, but Greenlee IS Jack's daughter and David is making life miserable for her. David is pathetic.

Jackson - David has hurt just about everyone he knows. David is the reason Erica was being framed and why her plane went down. Greenlee is his daughter and she is very unhappy. He may or may not have found out that she was being blackmailed. David is an asshole.

Jake - Jake HATES David. David has hurt just about everyone he knows. David made Amanda's life HELL and he tried to take their baby away way before she even gave birth. He made a devil's deal with her to have ANOTHER baby with him in order to make him stop trying to get custody of Trevor, even though he knew by then that he was NOT Trevor's biological child. David is always on Jake's case at work and threatening his livelihood. David has made life hell for TWO of Jake's wives (Amanda and Gillian). David has also made life hell for the Martins for years and years and forced Joe Martin to resign. David is an asshole.

Tad - David has hurt just about everyone he knows. The enmity between Tad and David goes back to pretty much the beginning of Dr. Dave coming to town. David had an affair with Dixie and has gone after Tad and JAR for years and years. It's a rare occasion when Tad and David aren't punching each other if they happen to be in the same room although, to be fair, it's usually Tad doing the punching. David helped Dixie to stay undercover in Europe, which ultimately led to neither Tad nor Dixie being able to find their daughter Kathy. David has hounded the Martins, one way or another on a pretty much continual basis. Tad HATES David. David is an asshole.

Liza - David has hurt just about everyone she knows. He DID deliver Colby in an emergency situation, though. Sometimes she and he are on good terms and sometimes they are not. Now he is involving her in his blackmail scheme against Greenlee, although he did put in a good word for Liza with the mayor, resulting in her new job. Even with his good word, though, he could just as easily tell the mayor he has a problem with her and Liza will be out on her uptight ass, so it may be pragmatic to get rid of him while she is still on good terms. She could dispose of the blackmail items and no one would be the wiser. Or she could hold onto them and use them for her own blackmail or evidence purposes. David is an inconvenience.

Damon - David is a mean old man who is also an arch-enemy of Damon's new-found father. Damon is off his meds, which makes him quite impulsive. Nuff said.

Krystal - David has hurt just about everyone she knows. He alienated her from everyone who loved her, married to her and got her addicted to drugs, leading to her temporarily losing custody of Jenny. He's been a terrible father to her daughters, Babe and eBabe. She still loves Tad, David's arch-enemy,although it always has been a rather lukewarm love. David was trying to ruin the life of her best friend, Angie, who is going blind (ostensibly because of David) and is pregnant. She hates him, but not with the same white-hot passion as some others. Krystal has been kind of lukewarm with everyone but Adam. David is tiresome.

JAR - David has hurt just about everyone he knows. Their enmity also goes way back to when JAR was about 13. David split up the happy home of Tad and Dixie. David thought JAR was a punk, a drug addict and a snotty little bastard who was interfering with David's relationship with Dixie (all true). David has been butting heads, often violently, with Tad from day one. David gave a lethal dose of drugs to Adam in order to "save the day". David hung around the tunnels (lived in them for a while) to mess with his family and try to find ways to get custody of AJ. David's unrelenting pursuit of custody of AJ resulted in AJ being placed in foster care for a while (with Angie and Jesse). David paid Amanda to seduce JAR and get him to start drinking again. David kept trying to talk eBabe into leaving JAR. David is an asshole.

For some and/or all of the above reasons or some other reasons, the following people are also suspects:

Bianca (who has recently renounced any loyalty to him)
Mayor Blanco (maybe he now has something on HER)
Asher (we don't know WHY he's here)
Annie (who doesn't really NEED a reason)

JaNut (Amanda's mother)
Tim Dillon (Amanda's brother)
Mary Smythe (Greenlee's mother)
Nurse Gayle
Marian Colby
Maria Santos Grey
Joe Martin
Ruth Martin
Jeff Martin
Jamie Martin
Pretty much ANY Martin
One of the Kennecotts
Happy The Dog
A multitude of lab geeks who did his bidding
And, of course, Anita *

*It's an ongoing joke from many years ago that Anita Santos is to blame for EVERYTHING that goes wrong because she was always saying "It's MY fault!"

Robin "let the murder mystery (such as it is) begin!" Coutellier

BC - Tue, 9/7/10, Part 1

Okay, David is dead. Presumably. The suspects are innumerable given what an evil, obnoxious, scheming, manipulative man he was. Really, we don't know yet if he died from a beating or poison or what, so even people IN the room when he staggered in are suspects. Of course, David being David, he COULD just be letting people THINK he died. Until we see the autopsy, we won't REALLY know. He's had a LOT of practice arranging for other people to be fake-dead, after all.

OR, maybe David chose this moment to end his own life in a dramatic way. Maybe he found out he really DID have a terminal disease. This way he can do a lot of damage with lots of suspects. Yeah he and Ryan were beating each other ,and he may have gotten into it physically with someone else after THAT, but what if he also took some sort of time-delay, undetectable potion he made that made him die?

Jake performed CPR on David for a total of about 26 seconds before declaring him "gone". Now THAT is a dedicated doctor!

I was wrong about the white dress on the extra I described in the last Boogie Chillen. Those aren't pouches, just some giant flaps of some kind. There may or may not be bow-like appendages to the side of the giant flaps. Whatever it is, it's HIDEOUS! The black dashes I described before, up close, are actually large square shiny things, similar to sequins, but much, MUCH bigger.

Mayor Blanco: "Your ethics are not a priority right now!"

Liza doesn't HAVE ethics. Truer words were never spoken in Pine Valley, regardless of the situation or people involved.

Have papers been signed as far as Liza being the new DA? Didn't that JUST happen right before the party, with the mayor telling her in passing? Does anyone in town OTHER than the mayor know that Liza is the DA? Oh, apparently the governor of PA approved it. That doesn't mean it's official, though, unless Liza filled out some paperwork.

Liza has way, Way, WAAAAY too many connections to David to be a prosecutor in this case. He delivered Colby. He's an enemy of Tad, with whom she has an off-and-on relationship. He's an enemy of Zach, whom she also loves. He's blackmailed HER on occasion, forcing her to represent him. She DID represent him (as she stated to the mayor). For all those reasons and more, there's no way in HELL she would be able to get anywhere near this case in real life. Don't they have an Assistant DA? Also, she falsely accused Jesse of raping or attempting to rape her when they were teens. It was a long time ago, but they should NOT be working together on a murder case. I don't know the solution to that kind of ethical dilemma in real life. In PV life, it won't matter one whit.

All things considered, Jesse did a lousy job of securing the crime scene. While he did need to tell people it was a crime scene and not to leave, he should also have been standing over the corpse and trying to guard it from being contaminated. Why is everyone from the party STILL hanging around on the terrace well after David died but his body was still there? Shouldn't they have been herded into a ballroom or something? But nooooooo, they're walking all over the place and sitting at tables, milling around the railing between the walkway and the terrace, getting all manner of contaminants (hairs, fibers, dust, sequins, feathers, etc.) on things. For all the police know, people are standing behind the railing and spitting on the corpse! There could be blood or other DNA evidence transferred to the railing during his fall. The extras probably stepped on TOP of his body to walk by when Greenlee was at the very nearby table with Amanda, because there really wasn't much room to do otherwise. And, of course, someone threw their jacket over him a few moments after Jake pronounced him dead, which, in itself, is contaminating the body and crime scene. What a bunch of knuckleheads.

Then Greenlee kneels down and holds David's hand and cries over him, contaminating the body and her OWN body by touching him. For all the cops know, she's also removing or planting some kind of evidence. TOTALLY bogus!

That ring Greenlee is wearing is GIGANTIC; it's at LEAST a 1"x1.5" rectangle that I would only expect to see on someone at Halloween or perhaps at a costume party. Maybe it's a locket and it's where she keeps her mad money, the key to her safety deposit box and few other spare rings. Here's a practical question: How does she wipe herself without getting it caught on the underside of the toilet seat? That thing is big enough to BE a toilet seat!

Greenlee tells David's body that he deserved better than this. No he didn't. He deserved far WORSE, given what he's done to people over the years. All things considered, it was a pretty tame death, even if he DID get beat up first. For someone of David's caliber and history, you would at LEAST expect some preliminary torture or bizarre punishment or other more exotic death like being buried alive under a park bench (oops, BTDT). Some other options:

  • He could have been thrown into a garbage bin just before pickup and been crushed in the truck or suffocated under tons of garbage.
  • He could have been tied to a railroad track.
  • He could have been asphyxiated from the overwhelmingly powerful air-freshener in his room or all the perfume, cologne, dry cleaning chemicals and dryer-sheet scents wafting from all the party-goers and waiters.
  • He could have been stabbed with a BBQ fork.
  • How about he punched someone who had just put a cocktail weenie into their mouth and the punch made the weenie fly out of that guy's mouth and into David's, causing David to choke to death?
  • He could have burned some gift from Greenlee in a fireplace and died from toxic fumes.
  • He could have gotten stuck in a revolving door in the Chandler tunnels, became nauseous, and choked on his own vomit.
  • One of his Facebook friends could have been mad when he unfriended them, so they posted an ad on Craigslist pretending to be him and asked someone to kill and eat him.
  • He could have slipped in the shower, fallen through the glass and landed with his head in the toilet.
  • Angie could have bit him when he poked his finger in her face one too many times and the virus she has mutated and went straight to his heart.
  • How about he tripped on the stairs, an extra behind him can't stop in time and her stiletto heel punctures his skull and skewers his brain?
  • Maybe someone sets it up so that it looks like he died from autoerotic asphyxiation?
  • Spontaneous combustion? I'm kind of surprised he didn't just shrivel up, leaving only his clothes and a wisp of steam or pile of ashes.
  • An infected papercut? On his tongue?
  • SOMETHING other than him being punched a lot which, let's face it, is kind of a normal day for him? Okay, maybe he has been punched SO many times during his time in PV that this was the last straw and he just imploded.
  • There should have been coyotes howling when he keeled over or a flock of seagulls passing and pooping on him.
They should have given us a death scene that consisted of more than him staggering in, everyone turning to look at him and him keeling over, just like that. A fall over a railing from a not-quite-3-feet above the terrace doesn't really cut it in the drama department. He should have been staggering all OVER the place, tossing out little insults and goodbye stuff like "Tell eBabe I love her" and "Greenlee loves ME, not Ryan" and "Hey Tad, Dixie was a GREAT f**k!" and "Don't forget to feed my goldfish" and "The person who did this to me is ........... uh-oh ..." Thud.

Come ON! How about a little CREATIVITY, writers! Okay, it's too late for an exotic death, coyotes howling or seagulls pooping on him. At the very LEAST, can we find out when they undress him at the morgue that he's wearing lady's underwear? A Wonderbra, a lacy thong, garter belt and stockings isn't TOO much to ask for, is it? And we want to SEE it.

Oh well, maybe Vanessa and/or Leo will show up at the funeral. They never found the bodies, after all.

David's been dead for a while. So why did a cop just THEN go to his room? Shouldn't someone have been posted there right away (and NOT gone in until Forensics had a chance to investigate) considering his room was right there at the yacht club?

All things considered, did it ever occur to Kendall's pea-brain that Ryan might need medical assistance? He IS semi-fresh out of a coma from a brain aneurysm, after all and he clearly has amnesia. Protecting him as far as David goes isn't going to matter much if he's (further) brain-damaged or dead (again). Why hasn't she at least taken care of the gash on his face? For that matter, why isn't blood smeared all over his face instead of just near the gash? You would think it would have bled profusely.

Apropos of nothing, I think they should introduce Mayor Blanco's famous daughter and have her (if she's of age) start a relationship with Bianca. If they got married, Bianca could be Bianca Blanco. Then we could call her BiancaBlonkaDonk.

Robin "who will be our Snidely Whiplash NOW?" Coutellier

Sunday, September 5, 2010

BC - Fri, 9/3/10

I don't mind Krystal's belt (although it's a trifle big) but the dress, overall, is kind of blah, at least for HER.

Opal's necklace is HILARIOUS - it's not just multi-stranded, it's MEGA-stranded!

That shimmery dress Bianca is wearing is NOT flattering. It makes her look droopy and bloated. It could be that it's her bad posture, though, and the dress accentuates the effects of said bad posture.

Did you see the white and black dress on the extra in the background? UGH! it look like it has fat dashes around her bust, waist, hips, and thighs. What is that supposed to be, an illustration on how to measure yourself in a Simplicity pattern catalog? And is that a POUCH attached to the front of it? OMG, there are TWO pouches, one at the waist and one at the bust! Put that one on Bianca with her bad posture and it would truly be a disaster! That's an AWFUL dress. The actress is carrying it off, but only because she would probably look good in anything. She's an extra and she wants to call attention to herself, so maybe that was her aim. I DID notice her, after all.

Don't District Attorney's have to run for the office, as opposed to being appointed. If that's not the case everywhere in the US, what is the law in Pennsylvania.

Kudos to the person who predicted that Caleb would soon change his name to Cortlandt! It's a tradition in PV for new-but-related characters to do that, but they hadn't done it for a while.

Robin "Asher Pike Martin Colby Chandler Hubbard Kane Cortlandt" Coutellier

BC - Wed-Thu, 9/1-2/10

I'm still catching up. In my listings for Tivo on Friday, only a portion of the description shows for the list of recorded shows, and you see more of the info when you click on that particular show. So for Friday it says: "Ryan blows Madison". Shouldn't that be the other way around?

Liza has an office? Since when?

If the mansion is on fire, why don't Angie and Caleb take Miranda outside until the emergency personnel arrive?

What's with all the big, clunky rings on Greenlee's hand? Nothing makes a hand look feminine, dainty and sexy like HUGE blobs of silver that would take silverware settings for four melted down to make. They look like something you would find in a bin in the plumbing section of a hardware store.

Madison has been flat broke for quite some time now and it's been a part of her storyline ever since she came back to PV. So why did she spend a bunch of money on expensive cufflinks for Ryan?

Liza tells David that she's trying to start a practice and that being associated with HIM is not exactly the best calling card. WTF? Didn't she represent him in the past for the express purpose of making a name for herself by winning his case? It was supposed to make her FAMOUS!

Why is Ryan acting like all will be revealed (against David) at the party when no one has actually gotten the information from Liza's office yet and they don't know exactly what will BE in the file (or if it's even a "file")? For all they know, the key goes to a locker in Grand Central Station or someone's diary.

Angie might want to start getting some training on how to cope with being blind BEFORE the baby arrives. She needs to learn how to use a cane and how to read Braille, among other life skills.

Someone should really tell Madison that she got a piece (like an entire unspooled roll) of toilet paper stuck across the front of her dress when she left the bathroom.

If Ryan can pick the lock on Liza's office, why couldn't he just pick the lock on whatever it is that needs to be unlocked within the office instead of Greenlee taking the risk of finding the key and bringing it to him?

Someone should also tell Madison that she accidentally put on someone else's hair extensions, because they are a completely different color from her own hair. Actually, they look more like a really blond Daniel Boone hat.

Robin "it's so easy to be a fashion critic when one has no fashion sense whatsoever" Coutellier

Friday, September 3, 2010

BC - Mon-Tue, 8/30-31/10

Ryan swears to Kendall that he and Greenlee are over and done and they will NEVER be a couple again. He can't handle it. Blah, blah, blah. How many times have we heard THAT? He and Greenlee and Kendall should all just find a place where polygamy is legal and marry each other, because that's all it's ever going to be. Yeah, Ryan will have sex with multitudes of women, but he ALWAYS ends up with one or the other of them. Always.

I'm seeing a lot of "soap moments" lately. A character enters a room, poses and says something that may or may not be important and there's ... a pause. I think organ music should make a comeback on soaps, because it's really too silly with modern versions of musical undertones. Scott has been particularly noticeable lately in his soapy entrances. It makes it very hard to take him seriously. Not that I ever take him seriously, anyway.

David made electronic trails in setting up Greenlee (calling the pilot from her cellphone, moving money around, etc.). I know we're supposed to believe he can have that all magically disappear, but it's stupid to think that's all possible, especially after this amount of time. Are we supposed to believe that a major phone company doesn't back up their data in innumerable ways and many different locations, nor does a bank or major financial institution? They DO have disaster recovery plans, ya know.

When Scott told Annie that he was glad she liked the dress he gave her because he had a matching one (for Emma), how many of you thought he was going to say he had a matching dress for himself?

Why would JAR and Marissa choose a PUBLIC RESTAURANT to tell AJ that they are splitting up? People sometimes do that to break up with others, hoping that the other person will have the good taste not to "make a scene". That often doesn't go well, with someone ending up with a drink or food all over them or a screaming matching (or a gun makes an appearance), so why would they put a 6-year-old through getting news like that in public? It may be Grandma's restaurant, but it's STILL a restaurant.

Caleb is awfully blase about the fact that smoke-afflicted Miranda, who is limp in his arms, may or may not be breathing as he tells Angie (who is, naturally, having a blind moment (and possibly a blond moment)) that SHE must save Miranda.

Robin "would you please resuscitate this near-dead child on your way out? Thanks." Coutellier