BC/Update - Tue, 9/9/08, Part 1

Some people in the SF Bay Area missed Tuesday's show because apparently their affiliate busted in on the show to air the breath-takingly exciting, fast-breaking news that the tree-sitters in Berkeley were finally coming down from the treetops after living in them for a year or so. They didn't want the trees to be cut down to make way for a sports complex of some kind -- apparently the fact that the university OWNS the land the trees are on (and, thus, the trees themselves) was not relevant to them. Let's see how they react when, 15 years from now, with a burgeoning family, only one bathroom and a mortgage to pay, some bratty teens camp out on their roof for a year or two and refuse to let them build a 2nd story to their home because it would displace the rabid, mite-infested squirrels living in the attic. I really didn't follow the story very much other than to be annoyed each time the protesters got on TV during the regularly SCHEDULED news, so I'm not going to argue pros and cons of the issue because I'm pretty much unarmed in that area. But I digress ... Here is a special Boogie Chillen to include an update of Tuesday's show.


CHANDLER MANSION

Annie, wearing her bathrobe and sandals, schleps into the bathroom. She looks agitated. On Monday's show, having decided that she had made her point with her hissy fit over Greenlee and Ryan. She seemed concerned that Ryan wasn't taking as much bait as she would like and that perhaps she was actually pushing him away with her behavior [go figure]. She had gotten him back over there on a pretext and then said they should get back together. Ryan politely declined -- he doesn't love her anymore and told her so point blank. Oops -- THERE'S a gamble that did NOT pay off! Richie pops up behind her in the bathroom mirror to explain what might be involved in the planning of the murder of Greenlee. SOOOO many details to consider! [I wonder if he also pops up in the bathroom when she's taking a dump] He wonders if she can REALLY "cross the Rubicon" (i.e., kill Greenlee).

Back at the Penthouse, Ryan takes off on his motorcycle.

A little later Annie schleps (she's not picking up her feet) back into the bedroom and finds the specter of Richie lounging on the bed eating a bowl of popcorn and requesting that she turn on the TV. She tells him to go to Hell. "Too late!" he cackles, popping another kernel into his mouth. He suggest that they might find a cool way to off the Greenster from a TV show -- she can't very well bash her over the head with a lug wrench like she did with Richie because that would show an embarrassing lack of creativity, not to mention an "icky-wicky mess" (he mockingly whines that last part like a little girl dealing with frog guts). [I really like Richie like this -- he's much more interesting than he was when he was alive -- nothing like being dead to bring out an even MORE devil-may-care demeanor] She schlep/paces some more and tells him to shut up and let her think. He suggest poison -- it's a classic, after all. He slips into a British accent and says: "I say, Holmes, this woman's decaf mocha, triple-cap latte has the distinct odor of ... bitter almonds. She plops onto the floor at the foot of the bed rejects it as too risky -- someone else could get poisoned by mistake. He agrees -- cops have a pesky way of tracing these things back to whoever did 'em. Perhaps a pro is in order? No, that's even MORE risky -- she has to do this by herself. He suggests the tried and true method of throwing a toaster into the water when Greenlee takes a bubblebath. She rejects that too. She knows what she has to do.

She muses that Greenlee has a lot of valuables -- she can stage a break-in, steal some stuff, and then Greenlee will die when she stumbles in on an intruder. Richies dubiously says it might work, but there are a lot of holes to fill in ... like Mr. Special Ops [well, yes, he IS a big hole] living there now, and Richie just doesn't see her overpowering both of them. Annie says she'll just make sure Greenlee is alone that night. He brings up the question of an alibi. He doesn't think Chief Hubbard is going to believe in another movie ticket stub. She jumps up off the floor and says she'll deal with it. He brings up a couple of other minor considerations such as alarms, etc. She says she's going stir crazy, then leaves the room.



ZACH'S CASINO

Zach yells at Kendall for spraying his employees with Mace so that Josh can get away. Kendall argues back, taunting him about what he's going to do to Josh -- break his kneecaps? Zach tells her to SHUT UP! Zach says he's not ashamed of what he's going to do next, but he IS ashamed of having allowed Josh to join the company and embezzle from him. Kendall reminds him that Josh is family. Zach agrees and says that that is the only reason he is still alive.

Kendall says Josh needs HELP -- he thinks he's OWED. Zach wheels on her and asks for WHAT? For what THEY did to him? For what they did to Greg Madden? Twenty million dollars of THEIR money is going to make him feel better? Kendall keeps defending poor widdle Joshie and his feelings. Zach angrily suggests Josh go see a therapist rather than steal from his FAMILY. Kendall accuses him of being fixated, like this ONE THING is the sum of who Josh is. [I'm practically speechless -- it's twenty MILLION dollars and Kendall is defending Josh like he dipped into the jar of quarters they use for laundry money in order to buy doughnuts and a hooker] She points out Josh's good qualities, particularly how good he was with the children. Zach says Josh was already stealing from them when he moved in with them. Kendall doesn't care. She points out that when Hannah went after Kendall with a gun, Zach tried to SAVE her life, not ruin it. Zach admits that Josh WAS family -- he held Ian at the hospital and helped keep him alive, and that's when Zach knew that Josh was HIS brother, too -- but THIS -- THIS is not nothing. Kendall has a revelation -- she realizes that Josh didn't just steal from Zach -- he broke his heart. Zach just looks at her, obviously very hurt at Josh's betrayal.

Zach issues orders over the phone and ignores Kendall who continues to point out how hurt Zach is because Josh wasn't loyal or loving enough. He brusquely tells her not to analyze him. She says they've ALL made HUGE mistakes -- he and her included -- they're a family and they forgive each other. Zach disagrees -- he's not a KANE and he does NOT give second chances. Kendall can't believe he's making this into a KANE thing. She agrees, though, that the Kane people DO forgive each other for HORRIBLE things they do to each other in pain, anger or just plain cruelty. She points out that the two of them forgave Greenlee for taking Spike and almost killing him and forgiving Ryan for wanting to sacrifice their child when Kendall was in a coma. He can forgive them for things that have to do with their CHILDREN, but not about MONEY??? Something as stupid as MONEY? She brings up more examples of horrible behavior and forgiveness. He says this is different and wants him to make her understand. He says she doesn't want to understand -- she just wants what she wants, as usual. What does HE want? He says he wants to protect his family and his business. She says fine, but not by ruining Josh's life. He dismissively tells her to go home. She assertively tells him not to disregard what she thinks or wants -- she is his WIFE! He says he HEARD her, but the decision is HIS. So that's it? Just like that? She's right there and wants him to TALK to her about it. He angrily says she doesn't want him to "talk" to her -- she wants him to AGREE with her. He says that she has to accept that that his NOT going to happen -- her brother stole from him -- he created this mess and Zach has no choice but to clean it up. She says she's telling him NO! He slams his hand down on the desk and says "IT'S ***DONE***!!!" They stare each other down for a few moments and then she storms out, slamming the door. Zach takes a manly slug of whiskey and snorts in angry frustration. [This is NOT the kinder, gentler Zach we've been seeing over the last year]


AMANDA'S YACHT

Taylor reclines on the bed and flexing and stretching her feet, remembering another time her feet were being massaged by a man as she laughed in sexy delight and says that if she did not already love him, she would START -- right .. NOW! In the present, she smiles fondly as her memory giggles. Then grimaces and winces, hearing bombs going off. She brings her knees up into a sort of seated fetal position and rubs her temples HARD trying to fight off the memory and the tears.


PINE VALLEY HOSPITAL

Angie continues to rag on Frankie (I refuse to call him Franklin) about going back to Iraq. He rolls his eyes and tells her it's DONE. She disagrees. Jesse walks up to them and asks what's going on. Angie angrily tells him that Frankie is going back to Iraq.

Jesse asks for more info. Frankie doesn't want to talk about it and goes off to treat a patient. Angie and Jesse hash it out a little. Angie is freaking out and Jesse is trying to be logical about it. [Having had my own son go off to Iraq for more than a year not once, but TWICE (the first time in Desert Storm back in 1991), this is kind of a hard storyline for me -- I'm TOTALLY on Angie's side!] Angie irrationally blames Jesse for setting a bad example for Frankie by rejoining the police force. In angry, frustrated, TERRIFIED tears, she thumps his chest and stomps away. Jesse holds his tongue and knows better than to follow her. He's clearly worried about her reaction.


ERICA'S HOTEL ROOM

Josh frantically tells Erica that he pissed Zach off REALLY BAD, so if something happens to him, she will know who's behind it.

Josh tells Erica that a few weeks ago he had made a bad joke about Zach not being able to control Kendall about her obsession with Greenlee. Zach went off on him and also yelled at him about getting too close to crazy Hannah, and how GREG MADDEN is his real family, not Erica or Kendall. He said Zach just went on and on. Erica doesn't think that sounds like Zach. Josh says Zach is still the same control freak that he was when she met him in Vegas and he lists various bad things Zach has done. He says Zach is NOT INNOCENT! Erica then makes a MAJOR understatement that could easily be missed if you weren't paying attention: "NO--well, NONE of us IS." She looks off to the side, presumably thinking of the multitude of sins SHE has committed. Josh says she didn't see the look in his eyes that that switch flips. Josh says he told Zach that he was a Martin/Kane and that he was just another one of Madden's victims. He thought everything was all right after that, but then a couple of weeks later he calls Josh into his office and says the paperwork is all off and that Josh EMBEZZELED money from him. Josh self-righteously demands to know why Zach would call HIM a THIEF!!! The NOIVE of the guy! Why would he embezzle from his OWN SISTER and brother-in-law? It doesn't make sense!

Erica, wincing slightly, looks him in the eye and point blank asks him if he took some money from the casino. He deny's it, saying "No, I SWEAR to you ... MOM!" Erica looks ... um, I'm not sure HOW to interpret the look. She is definitely surprised he's calling her "Mom", but it's hard to tell if she's pleased or if she KNOWS he's lying because calling her Mom is a sure tip-off.

Josh says Zach is flipping out right now and who knows how bad this will get. Apparently she has told him (off camera in between scenes) that she's going to talk to Zach and they can all be rational again. Josh says it's HIS problem, not hers -- she and Zach have already dealt with a lot of bad stuff. She agrees that they did, and it is MARVELOUS! They'll do it for HIM. Josh says it's time for him to move on, anyway; he's never spent this much time in one place or one job. She says that PV is his home now. He says maybe he just needs to give Zach some time to calm down for a while. In the meantime, he needs a little money. Erica wants more info. He looks worried and says it's better if she doesn't know. She astutely deduces that he came there to get money from her to escape. He says Zach had his bank accounts frozen; his pockets are empty and he's scared as hell of that guy.

Erica refuses to give him a dime -- they have barely begun to scratch the surface of their relationship and she doesn't want to think of losing him NOW. He gets close to her and says she is his mother; it's taken a hell of a lot to get to this point, but his leaving right now is not going to change that. She shakes her head and says she needs him there NOW. She gives him a speech about seeing the man he's become and how she can't let him leave NOW -- they'll MAKE Zach understand. Josh says that's not going to happen -- Zach wants to hand him a white satin ribbon just like Zach's father gave his victims. He says Zach runs CASINOS -- does she think he got there by being NICE? She says Josh's sister did NOT marry a killer. She walks out, shutting the door behind her, telling him not to leave, that she'll be right back. [she doesn't even take a purse with her -- I wouldn't leave MY purse with him alone in a room!] Sure enough, he runs into the other room and enters numbers on a keypad.

Josh removes a fat envelope from a safe and starts to jolt away from it when Kendall bursts into the room. She demands to know what he's doing NOW -- stealing from their MOTHER? He says he already talked to Erica about it and she understands that Zach has lost is freakin' mind. So why didn't Erica hand it to him herself. Like a bratty little brother, he whines that it's because Erica doesn't want him to leave -- she's deluded and thinks Kendall's maniac husband will let him walk out alive, but that's NOT POSSIBLE! Kendall calmly says this is a hideous mess, but Zach would never KILL him. Josh reminds her that Zach KNEW Greg Madden was buried underground alive -- WHAT is he not capable of?

She asks him what all that stuff was about him being family and being there for her and the boys. He snidely says that he's sorry that he can't be there for her when her husband wants to make him FISH BAIT! She's surprised and says she DEFENDED him to Zach! Josh mockingly says she deserves a MEDAL, because when he was out there babysitting her sons, SHE was out cheating on her husband, but SHE gets a medal for defending him! She tells him not to DARE turn this back on her! They opened their arms to him and took him in, treating him like family, even though he-- Josh: "Even though what? What, Kendall? I'm a crime against nature? Go ahead and say it!" Kendall meekly says: "No, I wasn't going to say that." Josh, with unshed tears glistening in his hurting eyes, says: "Yeah, you were. Listen, everyone knows that you and Erica took years before you were even civil with each other, and now I'm just supposed to stand here and go, 'rah-rah, Team Slater, Team Kane?' Well, you know, I'll tell yousomething. You know what my team is? Team JOSH, family of ONE!" Kendall is stunned and asks how long he has hated them. He says he doesn't hat her. She looks incredibly hurt. He says he just wanted something for himself -- the guy who shouldn't exist. He wanted to go someplace where no one knew, so he wouldn't be a freak show. She gently says he's not a freak show -- he's her brother and they LOVE him. Didn't he feel it? Has this whole time just been a lie?

Josh says that when he first came to PV he stopped being a person and started being Erica's how-is-he-even-possible-son, your brother, Zach's buddy, his right-hand man. I am so sick to death of it. Would you wish that on your worst enemy?" Kendall: "Is that what you are now? You're my worst enemy?" Violin music plays. Josh: "Kendall, either I leave or Zach erases me. That's how it is. And I guess right now it's up to you."


I'll try to finish up the rest of the update tomorrow.

Robin "you KNOW I'm incapable of doing a 'brief' update" Coutellier