BC - Fri, 4/22/11

At Kendall's instructions, Cara drugs the guard to Griffin's room (I don't know WHY she had to do that -- it's not like he or any other guard has kept ANYONE out of Griff's room, although I suppose the made sure Griff stayed IN it.  I recall, however, that there was a guard outside of JaNut's room when she sneaked out of the 4th floor window (with the aid of a butterknife), climbed down the walls, scaled UP the walls to Will Cortlandt's apt, killed him with a crowbar, climbed back down the side of his apt building, scaled back up to her room and scampered back to bed, all without the guard having a clue she had left.  Oh, and she was 8.5 months (or more) pregnant with Amanda at the time and was in the hospital due to high blood pressure or something like that.  Yup, PVPD DOES have a tradition to uphold of shoddy policework.

So anyway, after Cara drugs the guard, she creates a diversion (in order for her brother to escape) by pulling the fire alarm.  In a HOSPITAL.  How despicable is THAT???  Never mind that there are hundreds of patients in the hospital, some, no doubt, with heart conditions. There are also, no doubt, babies in the Neonatal Unit who may have to be evacuated.  There are comatose people on respirators.  And all the hospital personnel now has to deal with whatever they have to deal with when a fire alarm goes off.

Why are so many police officers (not to mention the Chief Of Police) on the upper floor where Griff was?  Did they all respond to the fire alarm being pulled?  Why didn't the PV Fire Department respond?

Kendall tells Griff to leave; go saves lives -- and don't look back.  Is that supposed to be a veiled message to soap fans?

Kendall promises Griff that she won't take any unnecessary risks.  Really?  Has she MET herself?  From the moment she wakes up until the moment she goes to sleep (or is knocked unconscious or is comatose), she takes unnecessary risks.  She says that even as she insists she wants Ricky to look her in the face and tell her what he did, regardless of what that will entail.  How about getting him locked up (or otherwise permanently occupied) and THEN "making" him look her in the face and confessing?

Robin "thinking of the times my Mom & one-legged stepfather have been in the hospital & if a fire alarm had gone off" Coutellier

BC - Thu, 4/21/11

Reverend Ricky magically appears on Kendall's yacht and asks her if there's anything he can do to help.  Kendall:  "Yeah, do you have one of those dickie things they sell on TV?  I just realized how low-cut my dress is.

Potential kidnap suspects:
Vanessa Bennet
Brooke English
Mark Dalton
Eric Kane (no one ever really dies, after all)
The Easter Bunny
Reese Williams
Barbara Montgomery
Brian Frons

When Ryan kept asking Kendall who else might have been involved, who, who, who do you think is involved, did anyone else think of an owl?

I guess it didn't occur to Ryan yet that Ricky "married" him and Greenlee.  Of course, it's entirely possible that Ricky got one of them-there internet minister licenses.  I'm guessing, that he stole the identity of someone who WAS a minister.

Robin "so R&G's marriage would STILL be void -- heh, heh" Coutellier

BC - Tue-Wed, 4/19-20/11

Angie is going to have to get used to ASKING who is at her door, even if she THINKS she knows who's there.  Not that any woman on a soap does (only on RARE occasions), no matter how much mayhem they've been subjected to in the past.

I LOVE how Emma is treating Greenlee!  WTF are Greenlee and Ryan thinking basically forcing Emma to spend a day at work with Greenlee?  I'm surprised Greenlee didn't make her sit in on a projections meeting.  Greenlee:  "I project that we will all be out of jobs by the end of September."  Emma:  "Sooner for YOU, if *I* have anything to say about it."

It was pretty laughable when Ryan told Emma that she could go to the Fusion office every single day for a month and still not see everything there is to be seen.  You can be there for less than 3 minutes and see everything that there is to be seen.

So Ricky DOES have a church?  When does he ever have time to tend to his flock?

Was I just not paying much attention (entirely possible)?  What very special thing did Ricky have set up for he and Kendall?  It looked like, um, the park.  Oh, there's a red blanket for them to sit on.  That's IT?  THAT is what he had to have extra help setting up?

I see Greenlee is still wearing her fetish heels.  Yes, I know they are in style.  They are STILL fetish heels.  Not only that, but she's had them for a long time (since at least last September), which is very un-Greenlee-like.  She strikes me as someone who gets new shoes at LEAST once a month.

Why are there fresh flowers all over Kendall's yacht?  Are they set up every day just in CASE she comes by?  She should think about donating the money spent on just-in-case flowers to the Miranda Center instead.

Robin "will Kendall and her retinue just sail off into the sunset, with or without flowers?" Coutellier

BC - Mon, 4/18/11

Bianca tells eBabe that Miranda Center donors are pulling out with the news of Griffin stealing drugs.  eBabe reminds her that SHE is the Miranda Center, not Griff.  It got me to thinking that Kendall is also (ostensibly) a big part of it.  Kendall is the one that squealed on Griff, which means SHE knew about it and didn't say anything and allowed him to continue doing work for and at the Miranda Center.  In fact, Kendall is often being arrested or going on trial for one thing or another.  Why doesn't anyone connected with the Miranda Center care about THAT?

Jesse is being an asshole about the baby.  Hey, you chose to keep that baby, so DEAL with it and stop punishing the baby for it by treating it as a THING instead of a PERSON! 

Angie, holding the baby, feels her way to the table where Jesse is doing some police work.  She feels the back of the chair and starts to sit when Jesse helpfully pulls it closer to her.  Uh, she had already oriented herself to where the chair was -- it seems to me that moving a chair that a blind person is in the process of sitting down on is a boneheaded move (literally) to make.  If she were REALLY blind, I wouldn't be surprised to see her and the baby tumble to the floor! 

I still can't get over how all those people are in a different COUNTRY (or territory or overseas collectivity (of France) or whatever it's called), Erica suddenly disappears without a word to ANYONE, and most of them just LEAVE!

Griff should have Kendall tossed out of his room.  Guilty of the crime or not, she'd be on my shit-list if *I* were him.

Although I think she was there in the room with everyone else when Erica disappeared, I can almost see Greenlee behind the kidnapping.  She hates Erica and doesn't want her to marry Jackson.  Again.

Wouldn't it be FABULOUS if Vanessa Bennett Cortlandt was behind this?  I don't know why she would be, but at this point I also wouldn't care.  Bring Vanessa back to do some mayhem and amuse us, and then have Leo come in on the last day to take Greenlee away.  (Of course, if that's already the plan with the storyline as it is playing at the moment, then they would already know that the show was going to be cancelled, since this would have been taped before the announcement.)

Doesn't Griff have a guard that should be keeping people out of his room?

Robin "Oh look, Kendall bought a clue -- it's about time SWEETHEART" Coutellier

BC - Fri, 4/15/11

Greenlee tells Ryan that she has ALWAYS seen Erica for who she really is:  a selfish, self-centered, evil stepmother.  Me:  "Like YOU?"  Emma:  "Like YOU!"  Okay, maybe not guffaw-worthy since it was easy to imagine it coming, but it was still funny.  Go EMMA!  She may be a mouthy little brat, but since Greenlee was probably FAR worse as a child (and WAAAAY worse as an adult), and since the show is going to end, anyway, I say GO FOR IT!

It is very uncharacteristic of Greenlee to just stand there and take it from Emma.  Sooner or later she's REALLY going to turn into the evil stepmother and, at the very least, yell at her. 

Erica disappeared from St. Bart's.  No one knows where she is, so why did Jack hightail it back to Pine Valley in the blink of an eye?

While Bianca was right when she said that (when she came out to Erica) Erica was only worried about how being openly gay would affect Bianca's life, but I take exception to the "only" part, because Bianca was also right when she accused Erica of only being worried about her image.  Erica was VERY worried about her image and was VERY ashamed of the fact that Bianca was gay, to the point that she shunned Bianca and bestowed lavish and blatantly girly attention on one of the mean girls "Shannon?".  She wanted Bianca to be a clone of herself and fought against any other option for Bianca.

So who kidnapped Erica?  Is is someone from her past or a new character?  If it's a new character, why bother, all things considered?

Robin "am I moving into the anger stage of mourning?" Coutellier

BC - Thu, 4/14/11

Erica tells Opal that Jack loves her, challenges her, and he has NEVER let her down.  Really?  For once she did NOT bring up the fact that she lost custody of Bianca because of him?  That's not really what happened, but it has always been something that she's kept in her arsenal when things have gone wrong with them. 

Regarding Jack and Erica's beginnings, they had an affair while she was still married to Bianca's father, Travis, and Jack, with his newfound integrity, refused to lie about it in court.  I say "newfound integrity" because Jack was NOT that nice of a nice person when he first came to town.  He was still handsome, refined, etc., but he was also scheming.  He schemed with Barbara (Travis's first wife, but they were already divorced by then) to steal some jewels, I think, or possibly report them as stolen to collect insurance.  I think the money had to do with money they either stole or mismanaged from Travis's political campaign (Jack and Barbara were managing the campaign) and they had to replace it somehow.  He and Barbara were also having an affair at the time but it seemed to be a f-buddy kind of thing.

What self-respecting kidnapper puts the kidnappee in a chair in a dark place with a spotlight shining down on the kidnappee? 

I think it's HILARIOUS that Erica's curving bangs are oh-so-perfectly arranged on the OUTSIDE of the blindfold.  The kidnapper apparently used the artful lighting to artfully arrange her hair.

Robin "who kidnapped her, Vidal Sassoon?" Coutellier

BC - Wed, 4/13/11

Reese is going to grant full custody to Bianca (she cannot "grant" it, only a judge can do that, but that's a nitpick) .  Well, that was a non-event storyline, wasn't it?

Is it my imagination, or was that wedding ring Bianca was holding HUGE?  It looked like it was the size of a guy's ring.

Robin "hmmm, Jack or Caleb?  No-brainer:  Jack" Coutellier

BC - Tue, 4/12/11

Okay, they kind of telegraphed a "complication" that will probably make Cara even more suspicious.  Frankie says Maya is in good shape and now they just have to wait for the results of the bloodwork.  Lucy is in to see her pediatrician for a well-baby check (I think).  There will be some anomaly in the blood work of both of them that will cause a link to be noticed.

Speaking of Frankie and Maya, there goes any theory of HIM being the baby's father.  They obviously didn't know each other prior to the appointment.

Flibbertigibbet
Strumpet
Town Lothario

Sorry, I had a sudden attack of Phoebe Wallingford Tourette's Syndrome.

Robin "I'll need to listen to some Perry Como now" Coutellier

BC - Mon, 4/11/11

How does Erica keep her anniversaries straight?

Kendall certainly is an ungrateful BITCH, isn't she?  She spilled the beans about Griffin at the drop of an arrest, despite the fact that he a) saved her life more than once, and b) kept her from killing David.  Mind you, Griffin SHOULD be arrested for his ongoing stealing of antibiotics -- he could have found another way, but it wasn't Kendall's place to volunteer that information when he was at the police station for an entirely different matter.  And given all the times Kendall has tried to set OTHER people up and how she, herself, has been the victim of setups, she should at least think twice about his side of the story.  Not that Kendall has ever thought twice about anything in her entire life.

It occurred to me that some viewers might not understand the friendship between Erica and Opal.  Or maybe they do because it is so well-established that it's just accepted.  There's a backstory to that, though.  Erica only had disdain for Opal for a very long time.  Opal was crude, low-class and tacky and she had earlier made life difficult for Jenny, who was something of a protege of Erica's.  Then Opal latched onto Palmer (a storyline in and of itself), Erica's friend and mentor.  Erica was horrified!

I don't remember the exact storyline that precipitated it, but Erica was probably being snarky or possibly needy (the Glamorama may have factored into it) and Opal pointed out to her that Erica had no girlfriends because other women were always considered a threat in some way, plus Erica was the ONLY one who could be the STAR in a room.  She told Erica that she would make an excellent friend to her because she was not competition in any way, shape or form.  She was not a threat and did not want to be a star.  She could only make Erica look better by comparison.  She was happy to not only let Erica shine, but to help her to do so.  She would also tell Erica when she was in the wrong or needed reining in, which most people were afraid to do.  Erica thought about it and realized that Opal was right.  Thus their friendship was born and has endured.  Erica finally had a confidante other than Myrtle.

Robin "Erica rarely lets OPAL shine, but Opal tends to make up for it by adorning herself with shiny objects" Coutellier

BC - Thu, 4/7/11

Wow, I'm STUNNED!  Jake actually asked Cara to take MOMMY and baby into room 424 to make sure the baby is okay.  A PARENT being taken in with their infant?  In PINE VALLEY HOSPITAL???  Unheard of!  Oops, spoke too soon; there's Cara and Jake in a room with Lucy and Jesse and Angie are elsewhere in the hospital.

That Ricky is a hands-on kind of guy, isn't he?  They've said that he sabotaged Zach's plane, thus killing Zach, but showing him strangling a woman to death puts him in an even more sinister light.  He looks WAY too pretty and baby-faced to have led a life that includes murdering people with his bare hands.  Then again, the best serial killers are the ones no one would suspect.

David said that they (he and Liza) had 14 years of foreplay.  Does he mean that's how long they've known each other?  If so, that's odd because he delivered Colby at an inn when the roads were washed out.  They need to make up their mind as to how long he and Liza have known each other vs how old Colby is.

Will the mayor win the next election?  If she doesn't, how will David be able to hold a hammer over people's heads?

Robin "he'd probably find a way to make Liza the mayor" Coutellier

BC - Wed, 4/6/11

Scott says he was a film major at NYU.  BZZZZZT!  He went to film school at UCLA.  He returned to Pine Valley and Greenlee followed him.  Unless he dropped out and then FINISHED at NYU.

Uh, I'm missing a key piece of logic here.  If they kill Kendall, wouldn't the casinos pretty much HAVE to be sold since neither one of the owners would be alive?  The kids would probably inherit everything.  Would they then try to persuade a guardian (Bianca?) to sell it?  Would the guardian even be ALLOWED to do that?  And if they kill Kendall, and everything goes to the kids, wouldn't the books STILL have to be gone over with a fine-tooth comb in order to do that?

Ryan invites himself to Madison's OB appointment.  WTF?  I don't care if he IS the baby's father, he has no right to butt in on an OB/GYN appointment!  They are not only no longer together, but he's married to Greenlee.  What's he going to do, watch her get a pelvic exam?  Yes, they did an ultrasound, but Madison didn't SAY they were there for an ultrasound, she merely said they were there because she had an OB/GYN appointment.  For all he knew, she had a yeast infection.

Not only am I askance that Ryan insisted on going to Madison's OB/GYN appointment, but, HELLO?  Emma?  What if Emma gets upset and runs out of HER appointment?  Emma seeing a shrink IS ostensibly why he and Greenlee are at the hospital in the first place.  Besides, NO ONE sees their doctor right away unless they are the first patient of the day or after lunch, so they'd just be sitting in the waiting room and they'd probably STILL be there when Emma came out to find herself abandoned, yet again.

Robin "considering how hell-bent Ryan is to know everything he possibly can about the genitalia of every woman in Pine Valley, perhaps he should go to school and become a gynecologist" Coutellier

BC - Tue, 4/5/11

A good soap twist would be that Frankie had a one-night-stand with the baby's mother, so the baby would be his sister AND his daughter.  Plus it might make Randi leave him (and thus Pine Valley).  Of course, the baby's mother looks so young she could be underage; as unlikely as it would be for Frankie to have a one-night-stand, it would probably be too over-the-top for it to be with such a young girl/woman.

Amanda tells Jake that they don't need Cara's help in putting together baby furniture.  Really?  Well Cara's not the one wearing a tight skirt and heels to put furniture together.  All Amanda is doing is being eye-candy and handing over a screwdriver on occasion, while Cara is actually doing hands-on work.

How far is Amanda's jealousy of Cara going to go?

Robin "time to bring JaNut back into the picture" Coutellier

BC - Mon, 4/4/11

Okay, I can hear the montage song now for when the baby has to go back to its biological mother (during May sweeps?):  You Picked A Fine Time To Leave Me, Lucille ...

What kind of cabbie (other than a child molester) picks up a 7-8-yr-old girl by herself, drops her off by herself with no intervention whatsoever by any adults?  And why aren't any of the adults questioning it?

Ryan makes Emma apologize to Greenlee and Greenlee says she doesn't have to and that it's partly her own fault for not keeping a better eye on Emma.  Bullshit!  It is NOT okay!  And no, Greenlee does NOT have to worry about Emma sneaking out again because Greenlee is going to have bars put on Emma's doors and windows so Emma isn't going ANYWHERE the next time she's alone with Greenlee. 

I LOVE that Emma is going off on Greenlee in that someone has to, but as a general rule, it's better to put the kibosh on that kind of behavior.  I would NEVER have gotten away with that when I was a kid, traumatized or not.  Given all Emma has been through with her interchangeable alternate parents, though, she's amazingly well-adjusted.  Even so, if I were Greenlee, I would take a pass on Emma making me breakfast in bed for Mother's Day.

Robin "Admit it -- how many of you have the song 'Lucille' going through your head now?" Coutellier

BC - Fri, 4/1/11

Who is the baby's father?  Maybe they can bring Reggie back into the picture.
When Amanda says her feet have been hurting lately, Jake says it's probably because she's been out of practice with the whole high-heel thing.  Really?  Amanda is usually all dressed up with no place to go, so I highly doubt THAT is the reason.

Wow, I can't believe they used the word "vaginal" on a soap!  OTOH, it would be pretty silly to hear two doctors referring to a va-jay-jay birth.  Then, later in the same episode, Jesse referred to Tad bringing in the "biggest-ass bear" for the baby.  While it was, indeed, a ridiculously large, bigass teddy bear (or as Tad says, TADDY bear), I had to wonder at the liberal use of normally taboo words they've used twice in one show.  And THEN Tad tells Cara a joke with the punchline being "would you believe it started out as a bump on my ass?"  New writer?  Did ABC daytime send out a memo?  The next thing you know, Jesse is going to be talking about baby shit.

Robin "and Krystal be serving shit-on-a-shingle (she already does, but they'll actually list it as such on their menu)" Coutellier

BC - Thu, 3/31/11

Cara calls Jake and tells him that Angie had the baby and it was not delivered in the hospital.  Jake tells Amanda (with whom he has been making out) about it.  Amanda says:  "You make calls, I'll drive!"  Then they leave.  Uh, where's Trevor?

This baby story is making me SICK!  Jesse and Angie's baby DIED, and not only does Jesse hand over the abandoned baby to her as their own, but he has Brot bury his bio daughter ... where?  A state park?

I know Jesse is overwhelmed and realizes he made a really stupid decision (and involved Brot in it), but this is SO wrong on SO many levels!  You'd think he would have at least thought back to when Frankie was a baby and his father-in-law was the kingpin of a baby-stealing/selling operation.  Jesse and Angie had to go through a lot just to get Frankie back after her father convinced her to give the baby up (he then SOLD Frankie).  The birth mother will want her baby back eventually and Jesse won't have a leg to stand on now that there is technology to identify DNA.  For that matter, for all they know, the birth mother was NOT the person who put the baby in the car.  What if someone stole her baby from HER and then did that?  They know NOTHING about the baby.

Jesse has to make this RIGHT!

Robin "he will, but how long will it take and will he be FORCED into it?" Coutellier

BC - Wed, 3/30/11

What kind of cop leaves his police car unlocked while he goes on foot patrol?

Doesn't anyone ever say "No" to AJ?  You know what happens to little boys who never hear the world "No"?  They grow up to be JAR.

Was I the only one that DID hear a brief baby's cry (the baby was still not all the way out)?  It was not coming from the baby in the squad car.

Oh, I do NOT like this storyline of Angie and Jesse's baby dying and Jesse and Brot swapping in the abandoned baby.  That is all kinds of wrong!  It's bad enough that their baby died!  Of course, I haven't seen Thursday's show yet -- maybe they WON'T swap the baby, but the temptation will probably be too great and they WILL.

I can understand why Jesse might not have any kind of first-aid equipment with him since he was off-duty, but Brot should have had SOMETHING in his squad car to treat Angie and/or the baby (like an air pump, sterile gloves, moist towelettes ... SOMETHING.

Robin "PVPD: always prepared (to do the inept thing)" Coutellier

BC - Tue, 3/29/11

Remember back when Colby was with her friends (Dre, etc.) and Petey was hanging around her constantly?  They had a storyline that she had a drinking problem but then dropped it.  I'm kind of surprised they haven't restarted it what with her current problems.  If anything could drive someone to drink, it would be finding out that your mother had sex with the boy/man you loved.  OTOH, it's nice to see someone working through it without resorting to substances, not that airing one's dirty laundry on youtube or pvtube or whatever is particularly healthy.

It's ridiculous that Krystal is running a business, yet she's STILL Jack's paralegal (a job for which she has no qualifications whatsoever).

Caleb tells Erica that he's waited a long time to feel alive again.  He delivers the line with all the energy and passion of someone waiting for an article about pork futures to load on the CNN website.

Line Of The Day:
Jack explains how the dockworkers helped him rescue Krystal from the water.  Erica:  "Well, how lucky the FLEET was in!"    Meee-ow!

JAR tells AJ that his mother IS going to come back to the house an they'll all be a family again.  That's a PROMISE.  What an arrogant asshole!

Robin "Have I ever mentioned that I think JAR is an asshole?  Oh yeah - a LOT" Coutellier

BC - Mon, 3/28/11

Pet peeve:  Jake holds up photos of Jesse and Angie and asks Tad which one is better.  All I could focus on was that he was putting his grubby hands all over the photos.  I HATE it when people do that.  Fingerprints get transferred and they WILL make a difference.  Have you ever scanned a photo with fingerprints on it?  It's quite obvious on a computer screen.  After 50-60 years, those prints are set in like cement.  What is so f**king difficult about handling photos by their edges?

Angie looks like she's about to barf.

Frankie and Randi start to make out in the Fusion elevator.  Then they slowly sink to the floor.  They're going to have sex on the floor of the elevator???  Ewwwww! 

Robin "Since there was no apparent purpose to that snip of a scene, I suppose they'll soon be expecting an elevator baby" Coutellier